Based on real events.
September turned out to be pretty nasty. As soon as the trill of the first bells subsided, the rains began to charge, the March winds that came from nowhere, and the temperature in Celsius fit quite well into one category.
The young man diligently walked around the puddles, trying not to stain his elegant black shoes. Behind him was another, similar as two drops of water - an unremarkable gray jacket, classic jeans, a thin face and an uncovered head with a mop of blond hair blowing in the wind.
The first went to the intercom and pressed the button. After a short electronic trill, a creaky voice rang out.
- For whom? the intercom asked.
- For Borey! - the guy shouted, believing that because of the wind it would be hard to hear.
- What? Who did they come for? There was obvious irritation in his voice.
- For Borey! The boy shouted even louder.
- You need to be quiet. – with a smile said the second. - They have a fig tube there, they won’t hear.
- For Borey I, for Borey. Boris. the first repeated in a calm voice, and smiled politely, looking at the second. - Thank you!
The intercom made an inviting sound, the magnet on the door clicked pleasantly, and the comrades in misfortune entered the kindergarten building. There was a dressing room inside - almost all groups in this facility had separate entrances.
- Dad! A scream came from around the corner of the locker room. - My dad is here!
Immediately, a small happy boy jumped out to meet the men taking off their shoes and rushed to hug the first one.
- Wait, Borya, it's dirty here. Dad replied with a smile. “Now I’ll go and hug.”
And my dad came! Another kid ran around the corner.
And mine is the first! Borya began to tease.
But mine is the second one!
Kolya, don't argue. the second dad said sternly. - Let's go get dressed.
The teacher appeared around the corner. She cast a stern look at the fathers - they came last, but then, as if remembering something, she smiled.
“May I ask you to sit here for ten minutes?” she asked. - The partner took the key with her, and I need to close the group. I run to the watch, there should be a spare. Wait?
- Sure, not a problem. The first dad shrugged.
- Well, thank you. - the teacher broke into a smile and quickly moved to the door. - I quickly!
The friendly company moved to the lockers. Borin, with an airplane, was opposite Kolya, with a ball.
“It’s hot in here…” the first dad said, thought for a couple of seconds, took off his jacket and laid it neatly on the carpet next to the locker.
- Oh, what a beautiful T-shirt you have, dad! Borya shouted, then turned to Kolya. - Look! I told you, my dad is the first! He even has it on his T-shirt!
Kolya looked up from dressing and saw a bright yellow T-shirt with a large red unit on the chest. There was another symbol nearby, the meaning of which the kids did not yet know.
- Dad, what is this number? Borya pointed at his T-shirt.
“It’s the letter C, son. Together read "one es".
- Dad, what is "es"? - Borya did not let up.
- Well ... The letter is like that. As in the word ... Superman, for example.
My dad is Superman! He is one superman! Borya shouted.
The second dad smiled and calmly continued to dress Kolya. The owner of the yellow T-shirt was a little embarrassed, turned to the locker and began to rummage through it.
- Dad, why are you so smart? Borya asked, pulling off his shorts. You were at the party, right?
- Almost. At the seminar.
- And what is seven ... Narem ... Minar ...
– Seminar. This is when a lot of aunts gather, and I and my friends in the same T-shirts tell them how to work.
- How should you work? Boris rolled his eyes.
- Well yes.
- Don't they know how to work? – the inquisitive kid continued to be surprised.
- Well, how ... They know, but not all. Something only I know, so I tell them.
- Kolya! Kolya! And my dad knows better than all the aunts how to work! They all come to his sermernar, and dad teaches them there! He is the first Superman!
– And mine also goes to sermernar! Kolya shouted, then turned to his father and asked quietly. - Dad, do you teach aunties how to work?
- No, son. I teach my uncle. And they teach me. We get together and everyone tells how to work.
Are you the first Superman too? Kolya asked hopefully.
No, I'm a programmer.
- Borya! My dad is a programmer! He also goes to sermernars and teaches uncles!
– Dad, who is this… Porgram… – Borya asked his father.
Well, I'm actually a programmer too. – quietly, but confidently responded dad.
– Aha! Heard? - Borya was in seventh heaven with happiness. “My dad is both a programmer and a superman!” And he's the first!
Kolya pouted his lips and fell silent. Suddenly, his father spoke up.
- Kolya, do you want to go to a seminar with me? A?
- Want! Want! Where is it, far away?
- ABOUT! Very far! You and I will fly by plane, we will take our mother with us, I will be at the seminar during the day, and you will swim in the sea! It's great, right?
- Yes! Hooray! Second time at sea! Dad, you're superman too!
- No. Dad smiled a little indulgently. - I'm not a superman. Unfortunately, Supermen are not invited to this seminar. Only programmers.
- So, Borya will not go?
“Well, I don’t know that…” Papa hesitated.
- Borya! Kolya shouted. - And we will fly to the sermernar by plane! And we will swim in the sea! And supermen are not allowed there!
- And I ... And we ... - Borya was about to answer something, but suddenly he began to sob.
- Borka! Father intervened. What is the sea to us? What a bore! We just got back from there! Let's do this better...
Borya stopped sobbing and looked hopefully at his father. Kolya stood with his mouth open and, imperceptibly to himself, began to pick his nose. His father looked away, but his tense posture betrayed him with giblets.
– Do you know what? Borin's dad finally came up with something. - We will go to the car factory tomorrow! Want? I’m just implementing there ... Uh-uh ... Auntie is teaching how to count money, and I can go where I want! You and I will go and see how huge machines are made! Just imagine!
- Want! Want! Boris clapped his hands happily.
“And they’ll give you a helmet too!” Remember, I showed you a photo of me in a helmet?
Borya nodded his head cheerfully. His eyes shone with happiness.
- And then ... - continued, almost suffocating, dad. - We'll go to a giant farm! Do you remember playing with your mom on the computer? There, chickens laid eggs, cows - milk, piglets - uh ... Well, what do you say?
- Want! Dad! Want! - Borya almost jumped out of half-stretched tights. “Will they let us in because you are Superman?”
- Well, yes, all the aunts on this farm think that I am Superman. Dad said proudly. “I did a great job of helping them count the money.
“Sssuka…” Kolya’s father whispered. But Kolya heard.
And my dad is a bitch! the baby shouted. "Really, dad?" Is a bitch stronger than superman?
- Shh, Kolya. Dad quickly started blushing. - This is a bad word, don't memorize it ... And don't tell your mother. Dad is a programmer.
- I also want to play on the farm ... - Kolya began to whine.
“You know what…” Dad smiled. "I'll make you a game myself!" The very best! And about the farm, and about the cars - in general, about anything you want! And let's call her... What shall we call her? Kolya is the best?
- Dad, how can we make a game? the kid asked incredulously.
- Your dad is a programmer! Father replied proudly. - Programmers don't climb pig poop, they sit in a tall, beautiful house and create games! We will make such a game with you - you will swing! We will put it on the Internet, and the whole world will play it! The whole world will know about my Kolya, everyone will envy you! Even supermen!
Kolya beamed. He joyfully looked at dad, constantly looking around at the frowning Borya and his unfortunate (at the moment) parent.
- Do you want Superman to be in the game? - increased the onslaught of Colin's dad. - Let him ... I don’t know ... Chasing chickens? Or chickens behind him? A? What is it? Chickens, geese, ducks, piglets, cows - they all run after Superman and try to pull off his pants.
- Dad, he's Superman. Kolya frowned. - He is the strongest, he will defeat all the chickens.
– Aha! But what about kryptonite? This is such a pebble, because of it Superman loses his power! You and I will have all the chickens made of kryptonite... Well, from a magic stone that wins Superman!
“Okay…” Kolya answered uncertainly.
- That's agreed! Dad clapped his hands. "Now let's get dressed!"
It was gloomy in Borin's corner. The father, not wanting to continue to think and look stupid, began to frantically dress his son. He clenched his teeth so that his cheekbones cramped.
“Daddy…” Borya said quietly. “The chickens won’t beat you, will they?”
- No. his father said through gritted teeth.
Will the police protect you?
- Yes. Police. Papa replied, but then he stopped, as if it had dawned on him, and sharply raised the volume of his voice. - Listen, Borka! Tomorrow we will go to the real police! Let's help them catch bandits!
The son smiled. Kolya, with his mouth wide open, began to look around in both directions. Father-programmer dumbfounded, and no longer hiding, looked at the enemy.
- Yes! Exactly! - dad took Borya by the shoulders and shook him a little, overdoing it with an effort, from which the baby's head began to dangle helplessly. - I know some aunts here ... And uncles ... Who stole money! And they think no one knows! And I know! You and I will go to the police and tell them everything! Just imagine, Borka, how happy they will be! Real cops! Maybe they'll give you a medal!
“I… a medal?” Borya was surprised.
- Certainly! You, son, a medal! After all, with our help, they will catch real bandits! Yes, they will write about us in the newspapers!
“Obituary…” Papa Kolya smiled unkindly.
- What did you mumble there? Superman suddenly screamed.
“Damn, dude, did a bee sting you in the ass or what?” Kolya, don't remember this word...
- Me? Superman rolled his eyes and jumped up. - And who was talking about the sea here? Who started first?
Borya recoiled from his father, took a step to the side and looked at what was happening with fear. Kolya again went with his finger in the nose.
- But what difference does it make who started it first ... Right now, are you going to merge your clients in order to win a stupid argument? Are you sane at all? They really are closed!
“I forgot to ask you, you fucking programmer!” Work hard, right?
- Well, the pepper is clear, I’m not teaching how to count money. the programmer said. “Go count the chicken poop, and don’t miss a single one, otherwise the balance will not come together.”
- What balance, moron? Do you know what balance is?
- Oh, come on, tell me according to your yellow-ass concepts. Yes, you know, but you don’t know ... Kindergarten, the right word.
- Well, and you with your beautiful tall buildings, what, not a kindergarten? Still agitate with cookies, milk and sofas, what are you writing in your vacancies? Eat, pee and bainki. See life first, visit at least one factory, then, five years later, come to the computer to write your shitty code!
- What for me your factories, if I already get three times more than you? The programmer smiled smugly. - To each his own. To whom - cookies and money, and to whom - to climb through dirty workshops, and kiss on the gums with aunts. And yell - I'm a programmer, I'm Superman! Ugh! Shame on the profession!
- Am I a disgrace? Superman stepped threateningly towards the programmer.
Suddenly the door opened and a panting teacher ran into the locker room.
– Oh… Excuse me… I ran for a long time… Why are you here? I heard from the corridor, are you discussing something?
The fathers were silent, looking at each other frowningly. The kids looked around in fear at the adults, trying to understand at least something.
- Discussed something, how much money to take for graduation? The teacher smiled. - A? Why are they red?
“No…” the programmer waved his hand. - So, we discussed a professional topic.
Colleagues, right?
“Uh…” the programmer hesitated. - Well, yes. Subcontractors.
- Clear. The teacher sighed with relief.
Superman also relaxed a little, patted his son on the head and began to pull on his jacket. The programmer wiped Kolya's snot, softly flicked his nose, from which the kid broke into a joyful smile. The teacher once again looked at the parents and left for the group.
“Oh…” Superman sighed. - We talked with you, God forbid they repeat at home ... Explain yourself later ...
“Yeah…” the programmer smiled with relief. - You are…
– Yes, I understand. You too. Yeah?
- Yeah. What's your name?
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Source: habr.com