{"id":34642,"date":"2019-10-31T21:59:34","date_gmt":"2019-10-31T18:59:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/prohoster.info\/blog\/summa-vseh-slagaemyh-1\/"},"modified":"2019-10-31T21:59:34","modified_gmt":"2019-10-31T18:59:34","slug":"summa-vseh-slagaemyh-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/prohoster.info\/lv\/blog\/news\/summa-vseh-slagaemyh-1","title":{"rendered":"SUMMA VISU SAIK\u0145U |—1—|","gt_translate_keys":[{"key":"rendered","format":"text"}]},"content":{"rendered":"

Trivialis un garlaic\u012bgs pseidozin\u0101tnisks fant\u0101zijas st\u0101sts par cilv\u0113ka pr\u0101ta un m\u0101ksl\u012bg\u0101 intelekta darbu, att\u0113lots nodr\u0101zt\u0101 skaist\u0101s fejas t\u0113l\u0101. Nav nek\u0101du iemeslu to las\u012bt. <\/i><\/p>\n

—1—<\/p>\n

Es s\u0113d\u0113ju apstulbis vi\u0146as kr\u0113sl\u0101. Zem fl\u012bsa hal\u0101ta uz kail\u0101 \u0137erme\u0146a pl\u016bda lielas auksta sviedru pile. Es nebiju atst\u0101jis vi\u0146as darba kabinetu gandr\u012bz dienu. P\u0113d\u0113j\u0101s \u010detras stundas bija briesm\u012bgi v\u0113l\u0113\u0161an\u0101s uz tualeti. Bet es neizg\u0101ju, lai nesastaptu Pavliku. <\/p>\n

Vi\u0146\u0161 sav\u0101ca savas lietas. Iepakoja lod\u0101muru staciju, 3D printeri, p\u0101rl\u016bkoja plates, instrumentu komplektus un vadus. P\u0113c tam vi\u0146\u0161 neticami ilgi apvija savus plak\u0101tus 'Visions of the Future' no LRD. Salika dr\u0113bes... Pavliks pirms stundas bija aiznesis somas uz koridoru. Un visu \u0161o laiku vi\u0146\u0161 trauc\u0113ja ar kl\u0113pjdatoru pie sava galda z\u0101l\u0113. Vi\u0146\u0161 vienm\u0113r izmantoja programmu, t\u0101p\u0113c es nedzird\u0113ju, vai vi\u0146\u0161 jau bija izsaucis taksi. Tagad, kad milz\u012bgaj\u0101 dz\u012bvokl\u012b, kas bija p\u0101rv\u0113rsts par darba studiju, palika tikai vi\u0146\u0161, es uztv\u0113ru katru \u0161v\u012bkstienu, ierakst\u012bjies aiz aizv\u0113rtaj\u0101m durv\u012bm. <\/p>\n

Man viss s\u0101k\u0101s pirms diviem gadiem. Vi\u0146a man\u0101 dz\u012bv\u0113 atkal par\u0101d\u012bj\u0101s p\u0113k\u0161\u0146i un strauji.<\/p>\n

Vi\u0146as ideja par savu startapu bija ilgi izstr\u0101d\u0101ta, un vi\u0146a g\u0101ja uz to vair\u0101kus gadus. S\u0101kotn\u0113jais koncepts visiem \u0161\u0137ita \u0101rk\u0101rt\u012bgi saprotams un realiz\u0113jams darbs. Tom\u0113r p\u0113c vair\u0101kiem p\u0101rv\u0113rt\u0113\u0161anas posmiem vi\u0146a \u0101tri to samazin\u0101ja l\u012bdz pasaules iekaro\u0161anai. Un kop\u0161 \u0161\u012b br\u012b\u017ea projekts nevar\u0113ja beigties cit\u0101di.
\n<\/a><\/noindex>
\nPavliks pievienoj\u0101s vi\u0146ai pirms pusotra gada. Piln\u0101 sast\u0101v\u0101 no divpadsmit cilv\u0113kiem komanda darboj\u0101s mazliet vair\u0101k nek\u0101 gadu. Prec\u012bz\u0101k - no vienpadsmit, jo divpadsmitais biju es.<\/p>\n

Gada laik\u0101 m\u0113s praktiski nebij\u0101m pametu\u0161i studiju. \u0160eit m\u0113s str\u0101d\u0101j\u0101m, gul\u0113j\u0101m un zaud\u0113j\u0101m pr\u0101tu.<\/p>\n

Dienu iepriek\u0161 savas lietas sav\u0101ca un aizbrauca Denis - m\u016bsu lingvists. P\u0101r\u0113jie to izdar\u012bja pag\u0101ju\u0161aj\u0101 ned\u0113\u013c\u0101. <\/p>\n

Bez vi\u0146as m\u0113s zaud\u0113j\u0101m galven\u0101s kompetences, bij\u0101m bezpal\u012bdz\u012bgi un toksiski viens pret otru. <\/p>\n

Projektam vi\u0146a bija vair\u0101k nek\u0101 galven\u0101 izstr\u0101d\u0101t\u0101ja. Un katram no mums - vair\u0101k nek\u0101 l\u012bdere. Tagad vi\u0146a bija divt\u016bksto\u0161 kilometru att\u0101lum\u0101. Psihiatrijas kl\u012bnik\u0101, dzimtaj\u0101 Kijev\u0101. Un tas bija viss, ko m\u0113s var\u0113j\u0101m vi\u0146ai izdar\u012bt. <\/p>\n

Es zin\u0101ju - p\u0113c tam, kad Pavliks aizv\u0113rs durvis, mana frustr\u0101cija un katastrofas saj\u016bta k\u013c\u016bs absol\u016btas. <\/p>\n

Beidzot vi\u0146\u0161 izg\u0101jis koridor\u0101. Vi\u0146as kabineta durvis bija tie\u0161i pret\u012b. Sprie\u017eot p\u0113c troks\u0146a, vi\u0146\u0161 jau bija uzvilcis z\u0101bakus un vilcis virs\u016b jaku. N\u0101kamaj\u0101 mirkl\u012b es dzird\u0113ju, nevis met\u0101la sl\u0113dzenes \u010d\u012bkst\u0113\u0161anu, bet \u012bsu kn\u0101b\u0161anu. Vi\u0146\u0161 sita ar saviem sausiem pirkstu kn\u0101b\u012b\u0161iem pa aizsl\u0113gtaj\u0101m kabineta durv\u012bm. <\/p>\n

Es paskat\u012bjos uz savu du\u013c\u0137aino atspulgu tum\u0161ajos izsl\u0113gtajos monitors. Uz mani skat\u012bj\u0101s sviedriem lip\u012bgs, izsists psihs ar taukiem matiem, kas st\u0101v\u0113ja vis\u0101s virzienos. Linu audums, ar kuru es noseg\u0161u vi\u0146as milz\u012bgo galdu, bija pilns ar sviedriem, kas tec\u0113ja lejup pa roku. Man \u0161\u0137ita, ka \u0161is dr\u0113be, k\u0101 ar\u012b viss kabinets, briesm\u012bgi smird\u0113ja p\u0113c manis. <\/p>\n

Pavliks v\u0113lreiz pieklauv\u0113ja pie durv\u012bm. Bet, ac\u012bmredzot, vi\u0146\u0161 necer\u0113ja, ka es atv\u0113ru, t\u0101p\u0113c vi\u0146\u0161 nekav\u0113joties uzs\u0101ka sarunu ar savu kluso balsi, ar vilkjo\u0161\u0101m inton\u0101cij\u0101m:<\/p>\n

T\u0113ma... Es sagatavoju tev specializ\u0113tu versiju. Brilles un bloks uz galda. Instrukcija Telegram\u0101, <\/i> \u2014 uz br\u012bdi vi\u0146\u0161 apklusa: \u2014 Vi\u0146a l\u016bdza, pirms\u2026<\/i> \u2014 vi\u0146a balss ievibr\u0113ja. Iest\u0101j\u0101s klusums. Vi\u0146\u0161 klusi uzsita ar plaukstu pa durv\u012bm: \u2014 tu tiks gal\u0101\u2026<\/i> <\/p>\n

Tad es dzird\u0113ju dzelzs \u017e\u0146augu, un vi\u0146\u0161 s\u0101ka nest kast\u0113s uz liftu. Negaid\u012bti sev pa\u0161am es piec\u0113los, iztaisnoju hal\u0101tu un atv\u0113ru kabineta durvis. Pavliks atgriez\u0101s ar v\u0113l vienu maisu un apst\u0101j\u0101s. Vi\u0146\u0161 pusmin\u016bti skat\u012bj\u0101s uz manu hal\u0101tu, bet beigu beig\u0101s tom\u0113r paskat\u012bj\u0101s man ac\u012bs, ko vi\u0146\u0161 gandr\u012bz nekad nedar\u012bja. Un p\u0113k\u0161\u0146i tuvojas un neveikli mani apsk\u0101va. <\/p>\n

\u0160aj\u0101 mirkl\u012b es ne tikai grib\u0113ju pazust, es grib\u0113ju nekad nepast\u0101v\u0113t. <\/p>\n

Vi\u0146\u0161 izg\u0101ja. Un aizv\u0113ra durvis. Klusums mani apklusin\u0101ja. Tuk\u0161aj\u0101, apklusu\u0161aj\u0101 studij\u0101 mana frustr\u0101cija un katastrofas saj\u016bta k\u013cuva absol\u016bti. <\/p>\n

Tas ilga m\u016b\u017e\u012bbu. Varb\u016bt stundu... Es aizso\u0161os l\u012bdz virtuvei un iz\u0146\u0113mu no ledusskapja iepakojumu ar neiroleptikiem. Es noriju uzreiz tr\u012bs vai \u010detras Chlorprothixen tabletes. P\u0113c tam vienk\u0101r\u0161i st\u0101v\u0113ju un skat\u012bjos uz vi\u0146u. Vi\u0146as pilna auguma portrets p\u0113d\u0113jos tr\u012bs m\u0113ne\u0161os ar e\u013c\u013cas kr\u0101s\u0101m tie\u0161i uz virtuves sienas z\u012bm\u0113ja Dizo \u2014 m\u016bsu dizainers. Glezna, protams, t\u0101 ar\u012b netika pabeigta, k\u0101 ar\u012b viss, ko vi\u0146\u0161 dar\u012bja. Stindzino\u0161\u0101s saj\u016btas un frustr\u0101cija nomain\u012bja tuk\u0161umu. Es aizso\u0161os l\u012bdz gultai. Nolieku galvu uz spilvena, un tumsa mani iegremd\u0113ja. <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Kad es pamodos, aiz loga bija tum\u0161s. Es nezin\u0101ju, cik ilgi esmu gul\u0113jis. Galv\u0101 v\u0113l joproj\u0101m bija tuk\u0161ums. Velkot k\u0101jas, devos uz z\u0101li. Atmi\u0146as par to, kas \u0161eit notika, l\u0113n\u0101m s\u0101ka izn\u0101kt viena p\u0113c otras. J\u016btas nebija. P\u0113d\u0113j\u0101 gada laik\u0101 es nekad nebiju redz\u0113jis z\u0101li tuk\u0161u. Pieci gari galdi stiepj\u0101s gar div\u0101m sien\u0101m. V\u0113l \u010detri darba vietas atrad\u0101s centr\u0101. M\u0113s visi to izveidoj\u0101m pa\u0161i no skaidu pl\u0101ksn\u0113m un d\u0113\u013ciem, ko ieg\u0101d\u0101j\u0101mies b\u016bvniec\u012bbas veikal\u0101. \u0160eit var\u0113ja ien\u0101kt jebkur\u0101 laik\u0101, un vienm\u0113r k\u0101ds str\u0101d\u0101ja. Visiem \u0113dienu gatavoju es. P\u0101r\u0113jie bija p\u0101r\u0101k aiz\u0146emti. Es biju nevajadz\u012bgs projektam, jo\u2026 neko neprotu. T\u0101d\u0113\u013c es r\u016bp\u0113jos par saimniec\u012bbu, cen\u0161oties netrauc\u0113t citiem, un \u0161\u0137iet, laika gait\u0101 iem\u0101c\u012bjos b\u016bt tikai \u0113na uz sienas. M\u0113s nekad ne\u0113d\u0101m kop\u0101 virtuv\u0113. Parasti ikviens pats pa\u0146\u0113ma \u0113dienu un dev\u0101s uz savu darba vietu. Es tikai sekot, lai \u0113diens vienm\u0113r b\u016btu pieejams. Katrs dz\u012bvoja p\u0113c sava grafika. Viens var\u0113ja doties brokast\u012bs, cits tikko bija pa\u0113dis pusdienas, tre\u0161ais g\u0101ja gul\u0113t. Gandr\u012bz neviens dienas nepavad\u012bja divdesmit \u010detru stundu garum\u0101. Tagad darba galdi, kas agr\u0101k bija pieb\u0101zti ar monitora un datoriem, bija gandr\u012bz tuk\u0161i. Tikai uz tiem m\u0113t\u0101j\u0101s piez\u012bmju gr\u0101matas, pap\u012bri, z\u012bmu\u013ci, p\u0101ris gr\u0101matu un vadi, kas ved no nekurienes uz nekurieni. <\/p>\n

P\u0101vilka galds st\u0101v\u0113ja st\u016br\u012b, atdal\u012bts ar div\u0101m plauktiem, kas bija pilni ar instrumentiem, apr\u012bkojumu, da\u017e\u0101diem komplektiem, platekr\u0101na un vadiem. Tagad tie bija tuk\u0161i. Vi\u0146\u0161 visu bija sak\u0101rtojis un pat iznesa atkritumu grozu, no kura p\u0113d\u0113j\u0101s tr\u012bs ned\u0113\u013cas visu laiku izl\u012bda kolas un d\u017eina pudeles vai varb\u016bt tas nebija d\u017eins... Galda centr\u0101 bija k\u0101rt\u012bgi izkl\u0101ts pilns m\u016bsu lietojumprogrammas palai\u0161anas apr\u012bkojuma komplekts. Vid\u016b gul\u0113ja papla\u0161in\u0101t\u0101s realit\u0101tes brilles. <\/p>\n

Es vienaldz\u012bgi paskat\u012bjos uz tiem un izs\u012bks. Apzi\u0146a joproj\u0101m bija pal\u0113nin\u0101ta, bet es atcer\u0113jos vi\u0146a v\u0101rdus, ka vi\u0146\u0161 ir sav\u0101cis man k\u0101du \u012bpa\u0161u versiju. Kas notika ar projektu un k\u0101d\u0101 tas f\u0101z\u0113, es sen vairs nesapratu. <\/p>\n

Es nezin\u0101ju, ko un k\u0101 iek\u013caut. Man nebija ar\u012b nek\u0101du v\u0113l\u0113\u0161anos. Es v\u0113l\u0113jos atrast savu telefonu, lai paskat\u012btos, cik ilgi esmu gul\u0113jis: nedaudz vair\u0101k par pusnakti vai ap pusotru. Z\u0101l\u0113 t\u0101 nekur nebija. Dom\u0101ju, ka tas bija nokritis kaut kur vi\u0146as kabinet\u0101.<\/p>\n

Vi\u0146a str\u0101d\u0101ja atsevi\u0161\u0137\u0101 istab\u0101, kuru es vi\u0146ai p\u0101rveidoju par darba kabinetu. Liel\u0101ko da\u013cu telpas aiz\u0146\u0113ma galds ar vair\u0101kiem plauktiem, kas bija pilni ar gr\u0101mat\u0101m, vi\u0146as darbu izdruk\u0101m un kaudz\u0113m piez\u012bmju lapu, kas bija kr\u0101tas gadu gait\u0101. Centr\u0101 bija divi monitori, bet pa labi st\u0101v\u0113ja milz\u012bgs melns dators, kas tie\u0161\u0101m izskat\u012bj\u0101s p\u0113c monstru. Es ar \u0161o galdu darboj\u0101s gandr\u012bz tr\u012bs dienas. Man grib\u0113j\u0101s vi\u0146ai uzb\u016bv\u0113t ko neparastu. Un \u0161is tum\u0161\u0101 koka galds ar pusapa\u013cu izgriezumu, apvilkts ar linu, vi\u0146ai patie\u0161\u0101m patika. Vi\u0146ai bija j\u0101str\u0101d\u0101 vienatn\u0113. Ien\u0101kt pie vi\u0146as bija stingri aizliegts. Vi\u0146a gul\u0113ja uz \u0161aura d\u012bv\u0101na blakus. Tom\u0113r p\u0113d\u0113j\u0101 laik\u0101 vi\u0146a gu\u013coja ne vair\u0101k k\u0101 \u010detras - piecas stundas, bet vi\u0146as dienas ilgums bija ap \u010detrdesmit vai kaut kas l\u012bdz\u012bgs, ko vi\u0146a pavad\u012bja str\u0101d\u0101jot. Reiz, kad es gul\u0113ju, vi\u0146a piezvan\u012bja manam telefonam un l\u016bdza atv\u0113rt durvis ar skr\u016bvgriezi un aiznest vi\u0146u uz vannu. Vi\u0146a bija pavad\u012bjusi vair\u0101k nek\u0101 asto\u0146as stundas, regul\u0113jot neironu t\u012bklu sav\u0101 kr\u0113sl\u0101, saliekot k\u0101jas zem sevis. Un no trauc\u0113jo\u0161\u0101s asinsrites t\u0101s bija sastingu\u0161as tik \u013coti, ka visp\u0101r nejut\u0101s. <\/p>\n

Es l\u0113n\u0101m apl\u016bkoju kabinetu. Telefona nekur nebija. Pastaig\u0101ju pa dz\u012bvokli, bet bez veiksmes. Galv\u0101 arvien sp\u0113c\u012bg\u0101k s\u0101k\u0101s jaut\u0101jums: \u201cKo dar\u012bt?\u201d. Caura emocion\u0101l\u0101 tuk\u0161uma izspieda \u0161ausmas un kr\u016bt\u012bs auga tr\u012bce. <\/p>\n

Atmi\u0146\u0101 uzn\u0101c\u0101s Pavlika v\u0101rdi: \u201cTu vari\u201d. Bet es skaidri sapratu, ka nesp\u0113\u0161u. Es nekad neesmu sp\u0113jis, un, jo \u012bpa\u0161i, tagad man nebija neviena \u0161\u0101da iesp\u0113ja. <\/p>\n

Telefona mekl\u0113\u0161ana ilga v\u0113l stundu vai stundu un pusi. Domu pl\u016bdi man\u0101 galv\u0101 pa\u0101trin\u0101j\u0101s, saj\u016btas un emocijas it k\u0101 atdz\u012bvoj\u0101s un s\u0101ka l\u0113n\u0101m piepild\u012bt manu pr\u0101tu. Es turpin\u0101ju s\u0113d\u0113t un skat\u012bties uz visu \u0161o iek\u0101rtu kalnu ar brill\u0113m centr\u0101, lai gan telefons jau r\u0101d\u012bja vair\u0101k nek\u0101 divdesmit procentus baterijas uzl\u0101des. Tagad es nesteidzos to iesl\u0113gt, jo baid\u012bjos. Baid\u012bjos b\u016bt sazin\u0101jum\u0101, baid\u012bjos no zi\u0146\u0101m messend\u017eer\u012b, baid\u012bjos no nepiecie\u0161am\u012bbas veikt jebk\u0101das darb\u012bbas. <\/p>\n

Es joproj\u0101m biju apdullin\u0101ts no neiroleptik\u0101m, bet mans dom\u0101\u0161anas process jau vair\u0101k vai maz\u0101k funkcion\u0113ja. Visa situ\u0101cijas \u0161ausmas bija taj\u0101, ka es perfekti sapratu: \u0161\u012b st\u0101sta beigas man jau ir skaidras. Es jau iepriek\u0161 zin\u0101ju, ka pievinu to, ka nes\u0113dz\u012b\u0161u, un bezsp\u0113c\u012bgi izg\u0101\u017eot posmu p\u0113c posma, atgriez\u012b\u0161os s\u0101kotn\u0113j\u0101 poz\u012bcij\u0101. Ar laiku emocijas izbal\u0113s, es atkal iesl\u0113g\u0161os sav\u0101 \u010daul\u0101 un dz\u012bvo\u0161u garlaic\u012bgu hikinomora dz\u012bvi, k\u0101du es dz\u012bvoju daudzus gadus, l\u012bdz t\u0101 k\u0101du dienu nepiezvan\u012bs pie man\u0101m durv\u012bm. <\/p>\n

Pa vaigiem s\u0101ka tec\u0113t asaras. \u201cK\u0101ds es niec\u012bgs\u201d. Kad telefons uzl\u0101d\u0113j\u0101s, tas uzreiz nog\u0101za uz mani sign\u0101lu lav\u012bnu. Es izsl\u0113dzu ska\u0146u un ieg\u0101ju mekl\u0113t\u0101j\u0101: \u201chlorpromaz\u012bna let\u0101l\u0101 deva\u201d. Tas uzreiz sniedza atbildi: \u201c2-4 grami\u201d. Man tuvu tam nebija. Es s\u0101ku raud\u0101t v\u0113l vair\u0101k: \u201cK\u0101ds es niec\u012bgs\u201d.<\/p>\n

S\u0101kotn\u0113ji t\u0101s koncepcij\u0101 bija psiholo\u0123iskais bots, kas pieejams 24\/7. Papildus pamata ekspertu funkcij\u0101m sist\u0113ma ietv\u0113ra \u012bpa\u0161as iesp\u0113jas cilv\u0113kiem, kuri cie\u0161 no bipol\u0101r\u0101m, trauksmes, \u0161izotipisk\u0101m un da\u017e\u0101d\u0101m cit\u0101m afekt\u012bv\u0101m un dom\u0101\u0161anas trauc\u0113jumiem, pal\u012bdzot vi\u0146iem sekot un kori\u0123\u0113t negat\u012bv\u0101s izmai\u0146as psihes darb\u012bb\u0101. Pirmaj\u0101 versij\u0101 anal\u012bzi veica tikai p\u0113c runas ton\u0101l\u0101 un rakstura, lietot\u0101ja aktivit\u0101tes viedt\u0101lrun\u012b un biomeh\u0101nikas parametriem, ko sniedza akselerometrs pa\u0161\u0101 viedt\u0101lrun\u012b, pulkste\u0146os un austi\u0146\u0101s. Attiec\u012bgi, \u0161im nol\u016bkam bija nepiecie\u0161ams viedt\u0101lrunis, bezvadu austi\u0146as un viedpulkstenis. <\/p>\n

Bet tas bija s\u0101kum\u0101. Tagad man priek\u0161\u0101 bija visa kalna izklaid\u0113jo\u0161\u0101 iek\u0101rta un vesela kaudze vadu ar spraud\u0146iem, kas bija paredz\u0113ti, lai savienotu vai uzl\u0101d\u0113tu visus \u0161os bateriju un skait\u013co\u0161anas blokus, papla\u0161in\u0101t\u0101s re\u0101l\u0101s pasaules brilles, aproces, pulkste\u0146us un austi\u0146as. Es ie\u0113ju Telegram: \u201cVienk\u0101r\u0161i dari pak\u0101peniski to, kas ir rakst\u012bts, un nesteidzies. Es pievienoju visiem aprakstiem bildes.\u201d <\/p>\n

Es m\u0113\u0123in\u0101ju ritin\u0101t instrukciju uz leju, bet t\u0101 \u0161\u0137ita nebeidzama. <\/p>\n

Visas asaras bija izliju\u0161as, un hist\u0113rija mazliet mani atlaida. Tagad es izmis\u012bgi alkstu p\u0113c izgl\u0101b\u0161anas. Es netic\u0113ju dievam. Mana vien\u012bg\u0101 cer\u012bba bija elektronikas un neapstr\u0101d\u0101ta koda kaudze, kas pat nebija k\u0101rt\u012bgi izg\u0101jusi alfa test\u0113\u0161anu. Es pat toreiz nesp\u0113ju noformul\u0113t, k\u0101dai tie\u0161i j\u0101b\u016bt izgl\u0101b\u0161anai un k\u0101d\u0101 veid\u0101. Vienk\u0101r\u0161i pa\u0146\u0113mu vissmag\u0101ko kasti, kas bija baro\u0161anas bloks, un s\u0101ku las\u012bt instrukciju, ko bija uzrakst\u012bjis P\u0101vels.<\/p>\n

turpin\u0101jums sekos... <\/i>
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